What do desktop clutter, inadequate tools for the job, a too-chatty co-worker and a troublesome relationship with the boss have in common?
They’re all tolerations, the little and big things you put up with—often without realizing it—that zap your energy and drain your life force. Every time you tolerate something, you deplete the energy you could be using to grow your business, make desired changes, or to simply experience joy. It’s like living with a low-grade fever or pain that somehow dulls your experience and zaps your full vitality.
Thought: When am I going to get to all that paperwork?
Thought: Ughhh, I wish he would just be quiet.
Thought: My computer just froze again—the third time today.
Zap! Zap! Zap!
At the root of your tolerations, are a variety of limiting beliefs that immobilize you. For example:
“I can’t take the time.” “That’s just the way it is.” “Don’t rock the boat—play it safe.” “Don’t complain or be too demanding.” “It’s not that important.” “I have no control.”
There are countless limiting beliefs, yet they all serve to dampen your life force and keep you playing small. And, boy, are they exhausting!
If you are truly committed to creating a work and personal life that is in harmony and fulfilling and if you want to fully express your unique gifts and be of service, it is necessary to consciously evaluate and eliminate the tolerations standing in your way. Here are some ideas on how to achieve that:
Make an honest appraisal of what you are tolerating in each area of your life: environment, health, work, money, relationship and so on. Write down everything that annoys you or that you feel you are putting up with, that is draining your energy. You may come up with more than 100 things you tolerate! That’s okay; this is a self awareness exercise.
2. Make Choices That Honor You
Once you are aware of the tolerations, take back your power by exercising choices. What will you say ‘No’ to or ‘Yes’ to going forward? Use your values and goals to help you decide between the yes’s and the no’s.
With the support of your coach, friends, or family, develop a strategy for eliminating these tolerations. You don’t have to do it alone—in fact, it’s more fun to partner up, or create a support team.
Create accountability around your goals with specific deadlines for eliminating tolerations. How many, and which ones will you eliminate each day?
Examine each underlying, limited belief that has kept you putting up with these things. Again, get support to help you break through them. You may be so close to some of these beliefs that you can’t fully recognize them for what they are.
Take an honest look at what you are getting out of keeping things as they are. There is always some kind of payoff for whatever is going on in your life. Who in your life—or what part of you—does not want things to change? Appreciate that person or part, and look for ways for it to be a win-win for all concerned.
Remember that complaints are usually unspoken requests. What requests do you need to make?
As you eliminate tolerations, you will start to experience an increase in your vitality and a sense of empowerment. Then YOU will be in the driver’s seat…and won’t that be a beautiful and worthwhile ride!
Dedicated to raising your consciousness!
Author’s content used under license, © 2008 Claire Communications