As I looked out the window of the coffee shop, I observed a young child, maybe 2 or 3, crying and upset. She had lost sight of her parent and was scared. She stayed close to the front door.
Another adult witnessing her distress tried to get her to turn around to see that her parent was just around the corner. She would not move or take any action. She remained fixed and continued to cry and cling to the door.
As I watched this scene, it made me think about how adults can also get stuck in fixed patterns of waiting and complaining…maybe even crying like the child, because we don’t want to take an action that feels so scary and uncomfortable.
If you have been participating in my complimentary four-part webinar series, I Desire A Change, you have now learned how self-awareness and self-acceptance are key components of change. I have also been writing about these two topics in my blogs.
This month we move into the Action part of my conscious change model.
Action is often the hardest part of creating change. That’s because when it comes to actually doing the work of change…anxiety, stress, doubts, vulnerabilities, and fears really come to the forefront and can paralyze us.
Action floats the crying child in each of us that is clinging to the door, afraid to turn around to see where the answers lie.
Thoughts and/or feelings like:
What will people think if I fail?
What if I look stupid?
What if others think it is a dumb idea?
What if I can’t do it?
What if I disappoint others?
What if I can’t meet their expectations?
What if they laugh at my ideas?
The list could go on and on, and these thoughts have the power to paralyze you if you don’t have a strategy for how to deal with them. They can have you acting like the paralyzed, crying child at the door.
However, if you have done the work of becoming more self-aware and self-accepting of these vulnerable parts of yourself, you will know how to handle these feelings when they make an appearance.
All the energy that was previously being used to suppress these doubts and fears is now freed up to direct towards actions that lead to change!
Taking new actions will feel uncomfortable and risky, but this is an indicator that work is being done outside your comfort zone. This is good!
When you take action, you learn how powerful and strong you truly are, and you increase your confidence and self-trust.
This week, identify any areas in your life/business which feel uncomfortable, scary or just ‘not quite right’.
Once identified, ask yourself this…“Am I playing the role of the crying child hiding at the door, or am I turning around and taking a look at my uncomfortable feelings?”
If you’re taking action, congratulations!
If you’re waiting:
First, give yourself a good hug, and explore what you’re afraid of. (self-awareness)
Second own, accept and love this part yourself. (self-acceptance)
Third, turn around and look. Face your fear, and move forward into action!
There are costs and risks to a program of action, but they are far less than the long-range risks and cost of comfortable inaction.
…John F. Kennedy